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Thursday, 31 December 2009

My life sucks big blue balls...
- I'm scared I'm going to lose my job. I was threatened to be fired on Christmas Eve.. from Publix for cursing.
- I didn't get to see my boyfriend on Christmas and I won't get to see him today.
- I just feel depressed all the time now
- I still take Zoloft, but I have no insurance to go to the doctor for a refill
- And I can't go see my Psychologist because I don't have insurance.
- United Healthcare is what I'm supposed to have, but they still haven't reinstated me, so I'm having to just wait... Fuck you, American Health Insurance companies.
- My best friend was supposed to be home for New Years, but she has to work up at her school ...while the rest of her family is having a party. Which I'm supposed to go to, but I'm going to be lonely. No best friend, nor boyfriend to hang out with D: I just want to cry about everything.
- I even thought about suicide... And that's not good.
- 2009 has sucked so much out of my life and I have rarely any happiness.
- As for schooling, I'm still working on my grades, but I keep falling back to my old routine... of not doing my work or not caring...
Anybody have any helpful points for me? Because as of right now, I feel depressed, lonely, and helpless/hopeless.
My 2010 Goals!
- to spend less money (especially on myself)
- to not fall back to my old ways of not doing my work (DO ALL WORK)
- to keep my job
- take Vitamin C and Fish Oil to stay healthy
- eat healthy
- get a tattoo dedicated to my Juggalo Family
Very Informative, and Easy to Read || Thank you XxFireXboltxX

Against The Grain of American Parenting Ideas : Breastfeeding | XxFireXboltxX on Xanga

Saturday, 26 December 2009

What an interesting thought?

The Controversial Survey

1) Do you have the guts to answer these questions? Yes

2) Would you do meth if it was legalized? Hmm, no. Meth scares me. :(

3) Abortion: for or against it? I already have a blog about this... I don't care to get an abortion, but i'd like the option to still be there.

4) Do you think the world would fail with a female president? It would if Sarah Palin was President. That bitch scares me...

5) Do you believe in the death penalty? NO, Why kill people who kill/whatever... make them suffer.

6) Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already? Yes

7) Are you for or against premarital sex? I am for, but... really I'm not sure about in general.

8) Do you believe in God? I believe in God, but i am not religious!

9) Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized? Yes and No... I gotta do research before I decide.

10) Do you think it’s wrong that so many Hispanics are illegally moving to the USA? No

11) A twelve year old girl has a baby, should she keep him? I just don't know...

12) Should the alcohol age be lowered to eighteen? No, maybe for Military personnel though. I'm scared that the cost of insurance will go up...

13) Should the war in Iraq be called off? Yes...

14) Assisted suicide is illegal: do you agree? Not really

15) Do you believe in spanking your children? I believe in positive reinforcements :) with a negative reinforcement if the kid continues to be naught.

16) Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars? No - but i'd like to burn all rebel flags...

17) Who do you think would make a better president? Somebody that is like our founders of the USA, idk?

18) Do you think Obama will be killed? I hope not, but it's likely.

19) Should child predators be forced to wear signs identifying themselves? Probably, but why just child predators. Why not sex predators in general?

20) Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers? No, it's the internet.

Thursday, 24 December 2009

Personal Information...

I've been through a lot this past year - I got introduced to the underground... (ICP, Tech N9ne, etc.) And I got rejected by the people who introduced me to it. Lost a bunch of friends. Got lied to ... and pretty much raped - I feel like I was because he just fucked me in the ass... didn't try to please me or anything. So anyway, the dude who did that - he said his name was Mark and that he was 25 - lied about both those. He's actually 33 < and his name is Gregory Allen Martin and he was my neighbor until recently, so I've been told that he moved. Well, I am glad he moved but the memories are still there and haunt me cause it happened in my house. I told him the truth... told him who I was... I put a lot of Trust in people, but he fucked my life over. And that really screwed up everything about me. I no longer trust people. I don't like being called Princess because that's what he called me by... To Catch A Predator sorta relates to me - only I'm not a minor. I'm 20. I've talked to the sheriffs department about him, but I did not tell them about him fucking me in the ass. Probably cause my dad was sitting next to me... And I still don't understand why I "allowed" him to do that to me.